We Need Love, but We Crave Romance

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Sometimes men want to be more romantic; they want to show just how much they really care, how much passion they really feel, how much their partner means to them, but it just doesn’t come naturally. Sure, they could buy some roses and yes they could bring home chocolates or a bottle of wine but what about women, like me, who see flowers as a waste of money because they quickly wither and die, who don’t drink wine because it doesn’t satisfy their taste buds (or because they are pregnant), and who see chocolates as less-than-worthy  notches in their belts? I have more love in my relationship than I ever thought possible and I need it like I need food and water, but romance is like Rice Krispies; I crave them; I long for them; I want them to be part of my major food groups.

This morning when I woke up, I found Rice Krispies in the refrigerator and cute, romantic, albeit corny, love notes around the house. Darren’s simple, sweet, thoughtful expression of love showed me that romance is alive and well. It was a unique and personal way to express his love and it brought a smile to my face all day.

By taking action in our romantic relationship, it sparks a deep desire in me to continue the commitment and thoughtfulness. Now, the question is… how do I return the favor?

“A happy marriage has in it all the pleasures of friendship, all the enjoyment of sense and reason – and indeed all the sweets of life.” ~Joseph Addison~

227 thoughts on “We Need Love, but We Crave Romance”

  2. Love the post, love, love the notes. If you weren’t giving him and showing him what he needs you would not be getting what you need. It is wonderful to see you both fulfilling your needs. Don’t think about it, just do what your heart tells you. Be encouraged! Be Blessed!

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      • Lesley and Darren’s relationship is truly blessed !

        I think saying “Amen” is perfectly appropriate. I don’t know if anyone here is spiritual or to, but we often remember God most in bad times and during hardships, but the truth is he also tests our faith with good things as well… So whenever something or someone good has been brought into our lives, (no matter what your religion) we should always remember to Thank God and say Ameen!

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  7. haha very nice on your husband’s part. Ahh how DO you return the favour? I could state the obvious but that’s not romantic, besides a 50″ Plasma is waaay too expensive : P Hmmm maybe a night in with popcorn, a movie that he LIKES and a blanket. Simple and cozy. Just like what he did to you : )

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  10. Absolutely so sweet and wonderful… especially that y’all understand your own special romance doesn’t have to be Hollywood style 😉

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  14. I understand what you are saying because I am a hopeless romantic. Unlike you, I do enjoy the flowers that come once in a blue moon unexpectedly. I save the dried petals and send them in packages to a solider far away that needs a smile. Although I am not married, never have been and at this late stage in my life don’t expect it, I still belive in love, magic and…notes! May the light of your love never go out.

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  21. OMG you guys are so cute!!! We have been married for 10 years, or rather 10 years in exactly 173 days! When we began our relationship my husband was able to travel far more then I was, so everytime he went away (to our home in FL) he would leave little notes all around the house tucked away in places so I would find them throughout the week. This began a tradition that we both did (and even a little bit competitively :)) I still do this to this date, it helps to keep the smile on our faces. Never stop doing these things which bring such happiness to the receiver! Love attracts More Love!!

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  22. He’s started the Valentine’s traditions early. What a great guy. And how romantic. I hope the couples I have in Paris this Valentine’s are that creative 🙂 I would “chairish” helping them do something this fun for each other 🙂
    Congratulations on finding the right person and keeping the romance going!

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  23. Great piece to start the day. But I’d like to suggest an alternative to some of the replies I see here. A number of people wrote that you, Leslie are “lucky” or that you and your husband are both “lucky”. I would agree that you were lucky to find each other, but I politely suggest that luck doesn’t keep romance going. Luck doesn’t keep love alive. Work does. It is clear from the punny notes that Darren works at it, and it is equally clear from Leslie’s blog that she works at it too. The best proof? Your last line, which demonstrates that you are thinking about how to respond, how to keep the romance going. That isn’t luck, that’s the best part of love.

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  27. How do you return the favor? Hmmm… A short VERY STEAMY romance written to him? Maybe something totally unaffordable he’s always wanted to do, in a setting where he’s always wanted to go? With some kinky you two maybe only joke about sometime? Something from who you are as an AWESOME ROMANCE WRITER! Like ten hot pages long. Then let me read it! LMAO

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  34. I love this post, from it’s title to the end! Yes, we do need love, by romance says that our lover is thinking of us enough to do something different to communicate it … and that confirms to us that our love is shared! Thanks for the happy start to my day … now to find a way to communicate romance to hubby today!

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  35. You are a lucky lady, and you’re lucky to have each other. That kind of thoughtful romance is nearly impossible to find these days! Thanks for the smile, and for reminding me that it still exists.

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  38. Thank you for sharing!
    I think one thing people miss in a relationship is knowing how to effectively communicate love for their partner. For many, it is because we don’t know how to say: “I prefer rice krispy squares to roses.” These notes are awesome and it is good you and your husband can communicate this way! I recently took a challenge from another blog to hand-write at least one love note per week to my wife. I may be stealing some of these, but don’t tell her!

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  39. I hide my notes where he will find them some other day than when I left them. The occasional one in his wallet, in the freezer, in his hair clipper case…not the everyday places. I am terrible because I never remember what they say, which he teases me about when he says what I said was sweet/cute/funny/lovey.

    I wish you would track back to my noon post today (out in another 45 minutes) which is on this very subject. It is a fine example.
    Red.

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  41. What a keeper! I wish mine would take a lesson from yours.

    When I was taking anthro in college, a huge discussion sprang up about the idea of reciprocity – the need to repay a gift. In some societies, repayment is a status indicator, and you are meant to outdo the gift with one of your own. In other societies, and I think the majority, people tend to feel like they are taking advantage of the person by not repaying the gift, and need to gift something or equal or greater value so they do not feel guilty. And then, my favorite, in some societies, repayment is almost like an insult. Like you didn’t actually cherish (or chair-ish) the gift.

    I say, don’t worry about returning the favor. He wanted to express his feelings, and he did a wonderful job. Let him know he warmed your heart (or else he might not do it again), and leave it at that. In the future, an opportunity will arise that you can be just as corny and sweet as he was. Plus, it will feel more natural and spontaneous. And that is what romance is.

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  42. I knew I was in love with my wife when our phone calls lasted longer than 5 minutes and I wasnt put off by it. I can;t go longer than an hour, of that, without her touching me or vice versa in some way.

    My favorite times with her are when we’re doing NOTHING and I catch he rlooking at me or me at her.

    Men get a bad rap for being about sex and not about romance. Sometimes I think women should look at themselves and say, “hmmm, is he really into me if he doesn’t just want to cuddle or be dumb or hang?”

    Romance is more than physical. It’s that inante desire of just wanting to be with someone.

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  44. When my girl and I first started going together, I started making her lunch (so that I know she’d having something good to eat).
    I also started putting a bag of cookies with an I Love you note (serious or silly). When we moved in together, she started putting them in my lunch.
    Those notes are the best part of my day.

    KEEP IT UP!

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  48. Awesome! I’m with you in the flowers dept (I used silk for my wedding because I didn’t have the heart to buy real). As for return ideas: chalk on the drive-way? Favorite meat in the fridge? My husband would love a huge thing of steaks and a bag of charcoal waiting for him on a Saturday morning. Or homemade pineapple or cheesecake. I try to keep it homemade if I have the time. I hope your pregnancy is going well! Babies are true miracles!

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    • Thanks for taking the time to comment; it’s appreciated.

      Although I do love anything homemade, I’m not much of a baker and it may turn out to be more of a disappointment than a treat. 😉

      How many children do you have? I can’t wait until she arrives and we can explore the world together. I feel truly blessed.

      Have a great weekend and stay in touch,

      Lesley

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      • I’m on my first, my son Akylis. My husband and I still want 4 in total. Everyone figured we’d change our minds once we had one. We are already missing the baby belly and wanting to start our second, but we are going to wait a little just to space them out. I love watching my son learn and experiment. He makes the cutest faces!
        You know as a chubby baker myself, you are probably better off health wise =) Another thing my husband likes is getting manicures and pedicures at home. He’s not so keen about sitting in the salon but he enjoys the pampering. I’m not a professional but I found this stuff called “one minute manicure” that makes the at home version really easy. Just massage in the scrub, rinse, trim and moisturize.
        Rub the belly and have a great Sunday! T

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