So I’m Not a Rock Star but I Still Love Hard Rock

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Heaven Hard Rock

You’d think drinking and partying all day and night would be awesome and easy but I tried it and failed terribly. Just like everyone assumes I have the most awesome job in the world where all I do it travel, post a few photos, and a couple words here and there and I’m set, the life of a rock star is hard. Two days ago, I had a plan. I was going to drink all day and party all night. Why not? I did it very successfully for four years in university. What’s changed? Nothing, right? I’m at the Hard Rock Riviera Maya and all the essentials are at my finger tips: all inclusive alcohol and whatever brands I want, the best nightlife in the country and at any all-inclusive resort that I’ve visited, a cool DJ, friends, and Heaven bar as the venue. It was the ideal combination for the ultimate drinking party yet I didn’t even make it to the starting point. What went wrong? I got over-confident and not in any of the right ways. 

After posting about my up-coming experiment, I was excited and started thinking about it. The more I thought, the more I drank. It started at dinner. I ordered filet mignon and a glass of wine, which was all that I was going to have all night. I had a big day coming up and I didn’t want to jump the gun. But then friends joined our table later and I was already finished my meal. So I ordered a Pina Colada. Well, you know how that goes; you have to have one for each hand.

New friends at Heaven, Hard Rock

Then, we made our way to the on-site Guns 4 Roses concert. Shots were going around and everyone had one in the their hand. It was like being under peer-pressure in high school. I didn’t succumb to it then so I shouldn’t even think about it as an adult but I thought I could have a few without having a few more. Before I knew it, I was the one in the line for a refill. Once you start, your reasoning skills become less and less. Drunk people are not like a fine wine; they don’t mature with age.

Heaven Bar, Hard Rock

By the time we went to Heaven bar, I was more than ready to dance. It’s funny that alcohol makes people the best dancers in the world. I was on fire! (Obviously, this was all in my head. What I thought I looked like on the dance floor was a better version of Shakira but the actual version was more like Elaine from Seinfeld.)

Dancing Couple at Heaven Bar

While this was all a slippery slope for a difficult night and an even more difficult morning, I was having a great time. I could have had the same fun without the alcohol and I would have danced. The only difference was that I was more free. I just didn’t care what people thought and I completely let loose. I danced with everyone in the bar. Young and old, men and woman, it didn’t matter. And people were open to it and happy with me. I met an older Spanish lady who hugged me after we danced. I met another younger lady who couldn’t stop smiling (maybe it was more like laughing at me, but she was happy regardless.) And people were more free in my presence.

Dancing at Heaven Bar, Hard Rock

Dancing at Heaven Bar, Hard Rock Riviera Maya

It was one of the funnest nights that I had in years. Why is it that I can’t do that without the drinks? I didn’t think about it last night or this morning when I was hung-over with a pounding headache and feeling sick to my stomach, but when it finally ended, I actually considered starting again because I loved my night so much. I can see how people become alcoholics.

What I realized though was that I need to figure out how to be so open and free without a drink. It wasn’t the alcohol that made me happy. It was dancing and laughing and meeting a ton of new people at the bar. I would have never gone up to them without drinking, but I should. We all should. Think about how much fun the night would have been if more people were interacting with others rather than just their friends.

So I’m not a rock star and I can’t drink all day and party all night. Actually, the thought of another drink makes my stomach turn. But I do want to focus more on being comfortable with myself and just letting go. The next time I’m in a social situation like that I’m going to force myself to reach out to someone I don’t know. You never know what the experience will bring.

40 thoughts on “So I’m Not a Rock Star but I Still Love Hard Rock”

  2. Hi Lesley,
    I think you’ve hit the nail on the head for a lot of people. Why can’t a person be freer without alcohol. This makes me think about and brings up thoughts of different situations in my life – where others whom have been freer when drunk, have used it to say what they want no matter how spiteful. The excuse ‘I was drunk’ seems to be used as a disclaimer but when you’re sober and those around you are pissed – it holds a unique set of challenges! 🙂

    What I like about you is your insight and ability to look at yourself, explore and understand your mental attitude and learn from all of it. It sounds like you had a great night. Happy travels.
    Janice

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    • I did have a great night and the morning wasn’t so bad. I was up and going at 8 am and didn’t let it change the rest of my day.

      I try to be reflective and make my life the best it can be. It’s not always easy though and I certainly don’t make all the right choices.

      Putting everything out there can be even more difficult at times. People judge and question, but I try to do what’s best for me. No one is perfect 🙂

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      • Hi again Lesley,
        I hope I didn’t come across as judging. I like listening to your travel experiences and the way you choose to handle things – whatever way they turn out. I especially enjoy your awareness as a Person, whom on becoming a mother, is beginning to encounter the full spectrum of emotions brought about by ‘loving’ your little one, living your own life and the challenges combining the both can sometimes bring.
        Listening to what you write, sometimes makes me think about my experiences (like this post) around alcohol. I’ve unfortunately been on the receiving end of some despicable behaviour in my teens – which left a very sour note in my mouth and caused me no end of problems!
        I quite agree with you – putting everything out there can be difficult, being vulnerable in the most constructive sense of the word, ain’t always easy ! 🙂
        I look forward to reading what comes next.
        Take care and have fun,
        Janice

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  3. I think a drink makes us more confident. Unfortunately it can also make us more foolish, reckless and very, very sick. Whoever comes up with the perfect formula for good time multiplied by positive after effects will make a million!

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    • That’s the way I see extreme adventures like skydiving. All rewards, positive after effects, and an over-all adrenaline rush. I think I’ll stick to jumping out of planes and leave the drinking to rock stars. 😉

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  4. Thinking the nausa would be the last of the party like a rock star for me. Somewhere between the wine and the pina colada. I had a lot of “fun” somewhere around age 49 or 50….It had to do with martinis, then wine, then the Captains party and what ever the “free drink” was, and then more martini’s. I never got off the ship in Ensenda that trip for my fish tacos….Believe it or not the cure was a glass of champagne. One of our friends said “the hairi of the dog that bit you”. Maybe this is why folks drink bloody mary’s or mimosa’s in the morning. Another friend said “never the grain shall cross the grape”….the message being don’t mix liquors and wine. I hadn’t been that sick sick since I was nearly 21…..My chaser these days is club soda with lime in between what ever I am drinking. Dancy makes you thirsty. Every drink gets that chaser….

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  5. It’s funny how we seem to be a little freer while drinking. I’m pretty outgoing, enough so that I’m just about as crazy without the alcohol as with the alcohol 😉 which makes me fortunate not to need to drink to have fun. But it seems like everyone else think you need to be drinking to have fun at parties.

    I remember really well a party I went to when I was about 18/19. I had loads if fun, obviously so much so that a person came up to me and said I probably should slow down my drinking! And I had only been drinking ORANGE juice all night, not a drop of alcohol!!! And the person would not believe me at all. He said that there was no way I could be that outgoing and have that much fun, and not be drunk!!!

    I have to say, at the same time as it was a pretty eye opening moment, it made me really sad on his behalf. How sad that people don’t feel free to be themselves without the drinking excuse!

    Yes, even I might laugh a little more and be a little freer with a drink, but I don’t need it to be myself. And that’s what I wish for everyone. To be so comfortable in their on shoes that they, as you say, let go 🙂

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    • I try to always be myself but I could definitely use a little encouragement to be more social with people I don’t know. I can be very shy, which usually surprises most people since I out my entire life out there 😉

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      • You seem to be very much yourself in all that I have seen 🙂 you reach out to people with great insight through your blog. I do understand the social aspect though, I have a few friends that are shy that struggle with the same when it comes to strangers. Even I have my shy moments at times.

        I think it’s the fear of the “unknown”, “what will people think of us”, the fear of making a fool of us, that’s stops us “cold” in interacting with people we don’t know.

        What we need to remember is that, people aren’t half as hung up on us as we are 😉 most likely they have enough with themselves not to care one iota about what we do 😉 and most likely they are just as “shy” in interacting with us! Having THIS in mind, makes it much easier (at least for me) when meeting people 🙂

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  6. Quite honestly I was disappointed in your decision to go out and party all night drinking… Call me an old prude, if U like… As an engineer, I used to be introverted and quiet around strangers… I wasn’t saved by God’s grace until I was 52…believing I was a Christian all those years when I wasn’t in God’s eyes !!

    But now, because I am relying on the Holy Spirit to take total control of my life…I can walk up to anyone with the confidence He has given me…(Phil 4:13)

    Sharing the “good news” gospel of our Lord Jesus Christ, at every opportunity the Lord has given me…has become the most important mission of my life…

    It should be the most important mission in every Christian’s life (Matthew 28:19-20)…but it will only become so, when pleasing the Lord becomes more important than pleasing our own fleshly desires…

    Blessings in Christ, bruce

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  7. I love the moral of your story! I totally agree with you too. If people could more often reach out and not only to people we know, but also to strangers, without being imprisoned by our minds and fears, then we might all be happier. Thanks for sharing with us, Leslie. I’m glad you had fun and I wish you much (alcohol free) happy times with others!

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  10. I’ll dance with you – even without shots!
    I am completely in denial right beside you – I did it in university and clearly I am still the same person….right?!?!?
    You look like you had a blast – hope the hangover cure worked quickly and quietly! 🙂

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  11. From a real rock star…

    ooh, Las Vegas, ain’t no place for a poor boy like me
    ooh, Las Vegas, ain’t no place for a poor boy like me
    every time I hit your crystal city
    you know you’re gonna make a wreck out of me
    well, the first time I lose I drink whiskey
    second time I lose I drink gin
    third time I lose I drink anything
    ’cause I think I’m gonna win
    ooh, Las Vegas, ain’t no place for a poor boy like me,
    ooh, Las Vegas, ain’t no place for a poor boy like me

    — Gram Parsons

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  12. I read your post with high interest, as I’m sure you’ve imagined. I love how you want to reach out to others, even folks you don’t know. You did! You do! You reached out to me a while back and you’ve made me feel special. Thank you so much. You’re very special and I love you just the way you are!

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  13. I tried some of that years ago. Then, I discovered I was missing out on a lot of fun and life.
    You can find me on the dance floor and up early greeting the dawn.
    Whatever doesn’t keep me alive or awake seems to have fallen away and I’m grateful for that.

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  20. That’s awesome. I’m not much of a drinker, but every now and again I’ve considered having a drink or two just to relax. But who says that can’t be a learned skill, no alcohol needed? Great post.

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  22. You voiced exactly what I felt for years! Years of repeatedly pushing myself (gradually) out of my social comfort zone made the difference for my being able to relax in unfamiliar social settings without needing the alcohol. Good luck with your change! 🙂

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  23. I know exactly how you feel. When I was young the alcohol made it easy to get up and dance and meet new people, but as I aged, I came to realize if I didn’t drink, I could have just as much fun without alcohol if I greeted strangers with the same type of abandon. All it took was to not think about what anyone thought and just relax and enjoy.

    Plus, I was in control and the next day I didn’t have to wonder what stupid things I may have said or did, because I could remember. Now all I have to recover from is staying up late, which at my age takes a little longer than when I was 21.

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  26. HA, I can see you being a total Elaine! Amazing. Alcohol is a funny thing, 2 drink max unless you’re in good company…if so, then enjoy, just don’t get sick! Funny post.

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