The Worst Thing In Life – You’ll Be Missed Robin Williams

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We live in a sad world surrounded by people who are questioning themselves and the importance of their lives, gripped by depression. We need to reach out and provide positive encouragement, support, and love before it’s too late, and even then it may not be enough. 

I am not immune to the stresses of life. I struggle with decisions that I’ve made, the direction that I’m taking, if I’m a good mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend…. I don’t suffer from depression, yet these stresses affect me greatly. Readers often comment on my posts and say things like “It must be nice”, “I wish it was me”, or “You are so lucky”, but this is not encouragement. Rather than making me feel good about accomplishing my dreams, most times I’m left feeling discouraged and dis-heartened, like I’m doing something wrong because I’m following my passion. How is it that the more successful I am in accomplishing my goals, the more disconnected I feel from others? Why do I feel like I have to hide my happiness to connect with people? Why is it that my posts about failure are the most popular?

Robin Williams has died. I didn’t know him personally, but he brought joy into my life. I loved his movies and his positive attitude. I assumed he was a happy man with so much to be proud of in his life. I would have loved to shake his hand and thank him for his contribution to entertainment. His smiling face and comedy brought light into the lives of others. The same can be said for a fellow bucket list blogger, Anita Mac. I read her posts with vigor and often wished for similar blogging success. She was my friend in the blogging world and I admired her adventurous spirit. Yet both of these people took their own lives because of depression. And the worse thing about depression is it’s ignorant. It’s ignorant to age, race, religion, culture, gender, and finance. Regardless of who you are, depression accepts you. It turns sunshine into rain and light into dark. It’s a mask to the world. I wish I could have done something to help them. I wish I could take away their pain. I wish people didn’t need to suffer because they feel alone. I am deeply saddened by this loss.

We can fill darkness with light. We can be a positive force in each other’s lives. I spend most of my days thinking about bucket lists and accomplishing my dreams before it’s too late. My bucket list isn’t about dying; it’s about celebrating life. We need to celebrate our lives and the lives of others on a regular basis.

Have you been a positive influence on someone’s life today?

Robin Williams said,

“I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is ending up with people who make you feel all alone.” – Robin Williams as Lance Clayton in World’s Greatest Dad (2009)

If you accomplish one thing today, please let it be making yourself and others feel happy and loved. No one should feel alone. Go and hug your family and tell them you love them. Encourage them. Support them. Show them love. It’s the best thing we can do all day.

67 thoughts on “The Worst Thing In Life – You’ll Be Missed Robin Williams”

  4. This is an important post Lesley. There is no need for you to apologize for living your dreams. You have worked extraordinarily hard to live this life and it is not without sacrifices. The loss of Robin Williams and others to depression is heartbreaking. As many others have said to day, ” If you know someone who is sad encourage them to talk to someone.”

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  5. Well written and articulately expressed. As one who has suffered from depression and have been low enough to understand why people commit suicide I couldn’t agree with you more in what you have stated and encouraged us to do/consider! I appreciate your visits to my blog/acknowledgments and the amazing life you live that inspires me in my journey towards fulfillment! God bless you and may God continue to richly bless you, your family, and your aspiration to enjoy the wonder and splendor of His creation!

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    • Thank you a thousand times over. While I may seem happy and fulfilled all the time, I struggle with anxiety and depression for time to time. I have ups and downs like most people. (I think the people who don’t are heavily medicated.) I just try to see the positive in every day and remember that I am capable of change if I’m truly unhappy.

      I wish you great happiness and laughter,

      Lesley

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  9. Thank you for this great post. Robin Williams brought laughter to every person he was around and entertained millions! I like to think that God got the final laugh on the devil when Robin came sliding in through the gates of Heaven with a big smile and holding a sign saying “Hey, What’s for dinner?” Peace ~Zoey

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  10. I have been crying all night. Uncontrollably at times. I am so sad that depression has robbed this world of another beautiful human being. I wonder why and in some ways I can understand it and this is what scares me more – in knowing what depression is capable of.

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  11. Excellent post. Reblogged on setyourpathsstraight. As some one who has family members with depression and mental health issues, you are spot on with your post. The world sees a man who seems to “have everything” but without peace, everything is nothing. God bless you Mr. Williams.

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    • It’s such a difficult endeavor when people are so good at hiding it or is it that we are too busy to notice? That’s what worries me the most. Could someone I know be truly suffering and I don’t see it? It is a reminder to open my eyes more.

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      • Well said, and I couldn’t agree more. Sometimes people are masters at hiding their sadness. It’s so sad that just weeks ago, Robin Williams had checked himself back into rehab for “maintenance,” and had been severely depressed recently.

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  14. Truly we have loss another wonderful human being. Troubled perhaps, depressed, alcohol issues, bad combination to hide within the deep depths of one’s anguishes and struggles. Greatly saddened by this loss and the profound issues causing he and many others in our society such obvious pain. He will not be forgotten for his contribution to the comedic industry. May his family and friends find some solace. C.L. Wiser.

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  15. Beautifully written post, Lesley. Depression doesn’t discriminate. It affects us all in one way or another – whether directly or indirectly. We never, ever know what someone else is going through. I lost my brother 8 years ago to this terrible illness. We need to lose our fear of depression and mental illness and speak out. We need to always show love, compassion and understanding. RIP Robin Williams, you will be missed.

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    • I’m so saddened to hear about the loss of your brother. Too many times I worried about losing my own because he is bi-polar and struggles with drug issues. Life can be so full of pain, both physically and mentally, that it it overwhelming. If we feel completely alone, we have lost. I’ve been having a difficult time with my brother over the last few months. Thank you for the reminder that I’m blessed to still have him in my life. I will call him thanks to you.

      I’d love to hear a good memory about your brother… if you’re willing to share. That seems like the best way to honor lost family members.

      Thank you for taking the time to comment 🙂

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  18. I think people who are genuinely positive and optimistic about life, and who have good fortune are the ones you will motivate with your blog. But the rest of us? (And I don’t mean this in relation to your blog) Most of us are just trying to get by, we have crappy things happen to us over and over, life is hard, we’re poor, or ill, or just found our spouse in bed with our best friend, our kid’s in jail, we drink too much, we’re overweight…I could go on, but the point is often other people’s failures or adversities makes them more relatable. More human.

    I’m someone who suffers from severe depression, illness, poverty, I’m a single mother…and I just don’t hang around with people who haven’t suffered some kind of adversity in their lifetime. I don’t have anything in common with someone whose life goes smoothly, or who doesn’t ever express having hardships. That’s just not real or genuine, in my opinion.

    Anyway, that’s my .02 on the subject. I’m utterly heartbroken that depression has claimed another talented and gifted soul.

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    • I understand that crappy things happen daily and more often by the minute than daily, but please don’t mistake my life as someone who just has good fortune. I’ve have hardships just as much as the next person. My father was a drug addict or a drug dealer; I don’t really know which one since my mother left him when I was two years old because he beat the crap out of her on a regular basis. I moved around every few years as a child so I never really connected with friends. I lived in an isolated, fly-in, northern Canada community for three years surrounded by hardship just so that I could pay my over $70,000 in student loan. That was after six years of university where I worked full-time, went to school, tutored, and volunteered. I was divorced at 27 and had to move in with my brother to get by. I was desperately under weight, which is just as dangerous as being over weight, and suffered from extreme health issues. I drank too much and had immediate family members who were drug addicts and in and out of jail. In one month, I lost my grandmother, my uncle, and my home. I had pneumonia and H1N1 and was hospitalized for weeks in that same month. That’s beside other health issues that I’ve struggled with my entire life. My life hasn’t been a walk in the park, but why do I need to say that to seem more relatable? I’ve worked hard to make my life full of good fortune and I still struggle with everyday issues just like everyone else. No one is full of happiness. I work hard at it and I like to share my joys and experiences with others. That should be seen as a positive, shouldn’t it?

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      • Hi Lesley,
        I think, because when you say all this it makes you real…

        I read this post before I went to sleep last night and your words stayed with me. I awoke thinking about them and you, once once again this morning. I don’t even know you if you’ll see this but reading this post and listening to what others have to say and your responses to them, has really got me thinking.

        I think for me – the death of Robin Williams is ironic – a man who has made the world laugh, has brought such joy to millions, has been a vital part of my life. My heart goes out as a human being – to another human being. As a Therapist – his portrayal of one in Good Will Hunting was as close to what good therapy can be – and helped me developed my character as a therapist. In Mrs Doubtfire my children, husband and I found tears and laughter in film together. As Mork – in Mork and Mindy, a crazy character whom I loved dearly when I was young. Yet we never knew the man… Such a shame that the light he managed to shine on the rest of our lives couldn’t be internalised, to bring a richness to his own. I can remember sitting with a client who was truly depressed – it was such a consuming experience energywise – it was as if she were made of sludge and she would look at me with despairing eyes… Sitting with a persons pain can at times be the most difficult thing in the world to do and at others the most fulfilling.

        What you have said above is real positivity in my eyes. Not just using positive thought as a way to stay away from negative experiences – to show where you’ve come from and what you are achieving is inspirational.
        Our adventures in life can create a huge mental freedom, which is different to most others – I have found. I haven’t been able to be in it long enough to ‘hold it’ if that makes sense. But if you never take a step towards your dreams – you never know if they’ll come true or not. In that there is safety – no risk. Of achieving or failing.

        Some people like that – and some people don’t. Some only want to be reminded of their triumphs and some of their pain. We’re complex creations us human beings.

        I enjoy hearing you getting to know yourself. What is of value to you. How it feels when you achieve or you fail – what comes to you and how you feel, when you are close or far away from your daughter and husband.
        I like the excitement I feel when you talk about wanting to fly in a MIG – that’s something I’d like to do or go on an expedition to Antarctica, that’s another. In those I connect as well.

        “Maybe it was the USVI where I completely crossed the line from fear to accomplishment? Yep, that’s the one that will stay with me for the rest of my life. What I did in USVI showed me that I can truly live a life without restrictions. I can push beyond fear and reach new horizons.” Lesley Carter
        I think I did this as a Mother when I took my kids out of school and went travelling for nearly a year. Now I’m working at doing it for me.

        This is the art – for me this is where my interest in you lies, I suppose. Doing something where you completely crossed the line from fear to accomplishment. This gets me thinking. This excites me as a person. This keeps me interested. I wanna know how – why- your thinking. I learn from you.

        Your thoughts as your life unfolds, the opportunities which you are given and those which you set out to achieve or go for. Your talent in your writing – for me when it is raw – is pure inspiration. I like hearing the whole person…

        That’s me!
        Thank you for sharing this with us all
        🙂
        Keep creating!!!!

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      • Dear Lesley, just when I thought it is the end of the world, this comment of yours brought some hope to my life. If you could pull it through, so can I. 🙂 Thank you for the motivation.

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        • It would bring me great joy to know that you truly found comfort in my post or my comment. If you’d ever like to chat more personally or just say hi in a less public form, please feel free to email me any time. 🙂 lesleycarter @ live.com

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  19. Well said…if we all made a positive effort in our daily lives…how many people would we touch? I think you have a special gift to go for your dreams, not everyone can do it…too many obstacles to overcome that may seem overwhelming and discouraging at times. Don’t stop dreaming. Wishing Robin is in a better place than he felt he was.

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  21. Just heard the news and so sad to hear that another great actor has died. I always loved him and he sure could make you smile. He will be missed. Lesley, you are a great mother and wife and consider you a friend. I know you have had difficulties in your life but you have overcome so much and I love the passion that you have for life!! We have all had difficulties. I was given 3 months to live in 98′ and I am here typing today. Hugs ♥

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  23. It is really sad. I am old enough to not make assumptions about the lives of others. We all wear masks to a certain extent. If we are lucky, there are a few people in our lives who know us completely. I think being a public personality must be hard.

    I like reading your posts even though I don’t always have time to read them right away. I am not one for extreme activities like you are, but I smile when I see your smiling face down with the fishes or flying through the air. I am not sure whether I will ever be able to travel like I would like to which is why I like looking at other people’s travel photos. In my experience, true happiness comes from inside. It comes from opening up to the magnificence, mystery, and beauty that is the life force within each of us. I am not lonely when I am alone and these days more often happy than not. It doesn’t mean there aren’t bad days or sadness. This is part of life. If you try to shut out the pain, you shuts out the happiness as well. I don’t assume when I read your adventures that you lead a charmed life. I am happy that you have written about the adventure so I can experience it vicariously.

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  24. Lesley, I see you as a very caring and encouraging soul, a great inspiration for all of us to live out our dreams 😉

    When we have lived and learned, we can choose to continue living a miserable life or we can choose to change our life in a positive way. It is our own choice, no one can live our life.

    I have been suffering with tough depression for years and I survived and found the light and life again. After being there it was also very needed to take a look at my life and find out, what to change to get a good life. Tough work yes, but I did choose to live and live good.

    When suffered people see so much positivity, it can be difficult for them to understand the background for this, which sometimes let them flow out their negativity against others.

    You do a big job for all of us and you are so kind to share your experiences with us Lesley, just go on in your way.

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  25. Robin’s death really made me think… wonder…It touched lots of people I can see now in the hours after the announcement of his death.I don’t know what it is, but there’s something very, very sad about what happened. It’s not an “ordinary”suicide. Maybe it’s his gentle face, or the fact that this was the guy who gave many of us these joyful, funny moments and now… this sadness. Propbaly the world couldn’t give him back what he gave. It’s a kind of paradox and I didn’t know he was suffering so much. I don’t say it’s the world’s fault, not at all, but surely the world we live in today often doesn’t help either. Anyway, maybe with sharing our feelings about the event and acting on it by maybe being a bit more sensitive to other people’s (often silent) suffering, something positive can come out of it. For all of us. Whatever the case, I do hope his wife and daughter can come out of this strong, big and full of love. However tough that will be.

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  27. I could not have said this better – I shared you writing on all my social feeds, I also have lost those close to me from depression. It is heartbreaking, and we sometimes feel helpless being unable to reach them on any level, This new world of “knowing everyone” and “social networks” will continue to isolate those who need us the most. We can never forget to be present in our own lives and others.

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  29. Lesley, it is a fact that it is lonely at the top. Your success in accomplishing your life goals is not fully embraced by many because your light shines (in their minds) on their lack of accomplishment. You are only responsible for you, not them. Please remember that, while it may be lonely at he top, your adventures and successes brings great joy and positive challenge to many. You are a bright light and positive influence to all of us, and you bring a smile to many faces with each blog. Never soft-pedal your successes and never apologize for your passion. True leaders serve, and you serve your readers great joy and wonder with each writing. You GO, girl!

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  30. Just because someone is famous doesn’t mean their life is easy. Over-work, loss of confidence, stretching oneself, a full schedule cannot be good for a body. I have always enjoyed Robin Williams and his special talent and will miss him too.

    This is a wonderful post. If we stop and think about it, we all need encouragement, reassurance and love.

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  32. I’ve been shaken since learning the news of his death yesterday evening. How can someone who illuminates the lives of others with joy and laughter feel desperation to the point of taking his own life? You are right, depression does not discriminate. Such a sad day.

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  33. I wrote about Robin Williams today as well ~ but I took a different path, because I loved his quote: No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world. ~ Robin Williams
    I like your tribute to him and I admire you for your passion and your bucket list! Keep soaring! ♥

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  34. Your statement about positive comments from others certainly rings true. Robin Williams was saturated with accolades evidencing his tremendous success, his contribution to the world of entertainment, and his gifts to the general population. However, that apparently was not enough. Depression is a selfish thief and, as you noted, is not deterred by race, gender, social status, economic status, or even religion. Being surrounded by people, even loving caring people, often is not enough for one who is immersed in this illness. Along with the support of others, prayer, professional counseling, and meds all work together to let the sun shine again. Thanks for your words and sharing your heart.

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  35. Oh, Lesley, I so feel your pain today. And as a fellow traveler and encourager of people following their dreams, I applaud you for speaking out in this post.

    Life is so precious. We are put on his earth to live out our purpose. I have recently gone thru the pain of divorce, and the self-examination revealed to me that my purpose is to share my positive energy and excitement for nature and finding the good in people. To do this in my work is pure joy. Encouraging immersion while traveling to see our amazing planet feels amazing.

    Do what gives you joy and a sense of purpose with the enthusiasm of a child. To have someone say to me “I live vicariously through your FB posts” actually makes me a little sad. You know?

    Keep the faith…you inspire me.

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  36. Yes depression is definitely difficult to deal with and it broke my heart that he passed away. I knew about depression first hand and also dealt with because my Dad suffered from depression for years. It is tough but I always did my best to be there for him and try to make him laugh…Williams was one of his favorites.

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  37. Thank you for this post! Made me cry but also appreciate everything I do have, and not what I don’t. If we all just took time to build up others and not make them feel bad the world would be so much better! This year I’ve really made an effort to throw out compliments every chance I get to anyone and everyone. We have no idea what is going on with anyone else – so why not make them smile if you can? (And I completely understand your comment about people saying you are lucky – that’s a hard one to respond to and makes me feel bad too.)

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  38. Pingback: “You’re so lucky!” “Must be Nice!” | They sent me to Binghamton

  39. The best moments in life – are the simple ones we share with those we love. Its’ not about a bucket list for me… it’s about who I get to love/and serve on the journey…. and honestly – that has led me to complete some things I never even thought to put on the bucket list.. .. Peace.

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  40. Pingback: My Article Read (8-12-2014) | My Daily Musing

  41. I was incredibly heartbroken to hear he had taken his life. As a child of the 90s, he is the voice of the Genie to all Gen Y/millennials in Aladdin. He also voiced the role of Batty in Ferngully, a bat suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder after having undergone scientific experiments by humans (he wears a tracker and everything) which was probably my favorite role of his (and a bit more obscure). However, I’m not surprised he struggled with such personal demons. He was very hyperactive in interviews (watch any of them on Youtube, while comical it’s almost disturbing to see how fast his mind goes in 10 different directions with all the impersonations his voice can do and tangents he goes on) and so gifted in comedic and dramatic roles. I dunno, maybe as someone who has dealt with depression in the past I’m able to easily recognize fellow sufferers. He was also getting older and being offered fewer interesting roles (which is why I am so glad I am not an actor, Hollywood is brutal to ageing actors, especially women). I just wish he had realized how beloved he was by the public and I’m sure his family.

    Failure is something people bond over. We’ve all had disappointments and failures in life and it’s easy to relate to that feeling of despair. People bond over success too, but it’s harder to be happy for someone when you personally may still be struggling. I know when I’ve been depressed, it was hard for me to feel happy for others when my future just looked like a black hole. Feelings of jealousy and annoyance arise and it’s just easier being negative. It’s part of being human and it’s something that I think we all try to aim for but sometimes fall short.

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  42. I attempted suicide a long time ago. I was surrounded by people, yet…all I could see and hear was pain. The blinders my depression had put on me were devastating. Even though friends reached out, I literally only saw them like ghosts. It was like they were not real, and in a way, I did not feel real either.

    It’s been difficult to come to terms with. I spent a lot of time convincing people it was a one-off deal, so much so that I half convinced myself I was better. I got used to saying I’m Fine when I wasn’t.

    But after his death, I have realized I am not fine. Sometimes I am good, and sometimes I am struggling. I am never fine, though. And I don’t think I will ever say I am, again.

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    • I can’t begin to say that I understand. I’m sure Robin Williams had family and friends that loved and encouraged him as well. It must be a difficult time for them now. They must have a million questions and doubts that they are dealing with too.

      It is scary to hear that someone attempted suicide and it must be even more scary for you after the fact. I wish that there was a way to remove that darkness and I actually think it’s in everyone. I don’t have the right words of encouragement so I’m not going to give an ill-attempt. But even though I don’t know you personally, I’m grateful that you’re willing to share with me and other readers.

      If you ever want to talk or just write someone that isn’t looking at you or standing next to you, please feel free to email me at lesleycarter @ live.com

      🙂

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  44. First let me say that I admire every success that you have had and every goal you are reaching for. I don’t want to be you, I think you are doing a magnificent job, but you inspire me and I believe others to be the best person they can be while reaching out, making lists and living their dreams. It is very powerful message you bring, about putting those dreams onto paper and then out into the Universe and then to actually living them. Your success is our victory too because by reading your posts we have all come just a little bit closer to actualizing our own Bucket Lists.
    I marvel at your bravery and know that each trip has cost you time away from your family and endless debates with yourself questioning your decisions. It is difficult to be a pioneer and believe me Lesley, you are a Pioneer Woman. You are teaching your daughter an amazing lesson about identifying your bucket list, living in the here and now, going out and grabbing your dreams and taking chances to make yourself happy. You didn’t just say it to her, you did it and the you say the same to all of your readers.
    To the people who want you to fail, that’s just their own fear speaking and if they let it, fear will swallow them whole. Nothing personal, that’s just how fear works.
    In regards to Mr. Robin Williams, your post is timely and reflective of a lovely, vulnerable, sad, and funny soul. He will be missed and adored for generations to come. However his bright life came to an end, he shone brighter than most during his time here on earth and I look forward to looking up at the bright star that shines in the night sky and saying, Na Nu- Na Nu!
    Great post. 🙂

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  45. Thank you for this Lesley you are a gem! And to reiterate, “If you accomplish one thing today, please let it be making yourself and others feel happy and loved. No one should feel alone. Go and hug your family and tell them you love them. Encourage them. Support them. Show them love. It’s the best thing we can do all day.”

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  46. To my despair, I’ve found myself in this position more than once… questioning myself what life have got for me. I fell into constant depression, searching for the meaning of life. But every time I wanted to give up, there’s always someone who’ll hold me up, give me the strength to continue living. And I certainly acknowledge that not everyone are blessed to have angels saving them from falling… Some live a tough life. RIP Robin Williams. You’re in a better place. 🙂

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  47. Leslie, Thanks for the thoughtful posts-especially this one. One of the last things I talked about on Monday with my Dad was Robin’s Death. My Father passed away on Tuesday from Parkinson’s Disease…Wow. You are doing exactly what you should be..don’t ever let anyone else define your work..only you know what it is and it appears as though you are succeeding at inspiring others. Keep it up.

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  48. Hey 🙂

    I hear you about your comment of having to “hide your happiness.” it’s sad that people are drawn to other people’s failures… shucks… a bit nasty actually… Hmm, I think you’ve created your life (maybe with some divine help 😉 BUT don’t be apologetic about your “awesome” life.

    I know you live with appreciation and gratitude and that’s what matters.

    In the words of Jimmy Eat World “Don’t worry what the bitter hearts are going to say.”

    keep living adventurously!

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  49. Hi, this blog really touches my heart.. Sometimes surrounded by ppl doesn’t mean u don’t feel lonely. I have reblogged your article to share with more ppl and remind myself, to love my loved ones and live my life.

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  50. Well said. I make it a point to smile at strangers I pass as I run my errands and say good morning/afternoon. Every now and then I get a smile back. It takes no time, very little energy, and helps dissolve the invisibility barrier.

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